First Braid

I know its silly to be so happy about such an insignificant little thing but truthfully, braiding Jayda's hair was the highlight of my night. (That says a lot about my life I know.) Someday soon I'm going to attempt the french braid. Woohoo!

Mr. Whistler??

Today I went to the dentist to get a filling fixed and Brady went with me for his first checkup. Brady sat on my lap while the dentist fixed my filling and I about died. Not only was Brady moving around and rocking the chair while the dentist was drilling my mouth but he also kept poking his head in my face because he quote "wanted to see!" The dentist also about killed me with his baby talk to Brady. Ok so maybe not baby talk, but definite kidspeak. Every little thing he did to me, he explained to Brady. He called the drill Mr. Whistler, the suction straw Mr. Sucker, the water for rinsing Mr. Squirter, and the thing he used to help dry the composite Mr. Blowdryer. I never knew my dentist had it in him. Kind of funny that everything was Mr. Where's the Mrs?

When it came time for Brady's cleaning and checkup he was fairly cooperative and did a good job overall - no tears were shed anyway. The dentist did note that Brady was/had been a thumb or NUK sucker. He said it was good that we cut him off. As it is, his bite is already a little off. Oh well. Better late than never.

After the visit Brady called up Brian and said "No cavities Dad." (Of course I told him to say that, but it was so cute to watch him be so proud of himself.)

Ruh-oh

At daycare they let the kids watch Scooby Doo. So now Brady loves singing the theme song. Or I should say trying to sing it. This was all he could get out:

Scooby-Dooby-Doo, Where Are You? We got some (blank) for you now.
Scooby-Dooby-Doo, Where Are You? We (blank, blank, blank) ....

And then he would continue to hum for the rest of the song. It was driving me nuts that I couldn't remember the words either so today I finally looked them up:

Scooby-Dooby-Doo, Where Are You? We got some work to do now.
Scooby-Dooby-Doo, Where Are You? We need some help from you now.

Come on Scooby-Doo, I see you... pretending you got a sliver

But you're not fooling me, cause I can see, the way you shake and shiver.

You know we got a mystery to solve, so Scooby Doo be ready for your act.
[Scooby Doo] Uh-uh Uh-uh
Don't hold back!
And Scooby Doo if you come through
you're going to have yourself a scooby snack!
That's a fact!

Scooby-Dooby-Doo, here Are You. You're ready and you're willing.
If we can count on you Scooby Doo, I know you'll catch that villian.

Birthday Party

Last night was Brady's birthday party. Too bad he didn't feel like partying. Silly kid plugged his ears when it came time to sing happy birthday to him.

Thanks to everyone who came over. Thanks for all of the presents too! :) Maybe next year Brady will be more festive.
And maybe next year I'll be smarter and not fill the goody bags with whistles. Sorry April.

Grandma's birthday visit

Friday I left work early to go home and clean before my mom got into town and also to be there for the carpet guy. We finally got our nasty carpets cleaned!! Yay! (You can see where the guy stopped cleaning to show me the before and after.)

Friday night we didn't do much: just played and ate the dinner my Dad homemade and sent down with my Mom. It was his birthday present to me. Very sweet Dad. BBQ chicken, cucumber salad, macaroni salad, and homemade applesauce. Yummy.

Saturday after both my mom and I exercised we went to FleetFarm so she could pick up feed and junk for her horses. Then Saturday night my Mom kicked Brian and me out. She said we needed alone time. So off we went to dinner and then we picked up a movie (the Inside Man and it was good) to watch back at the house. We also opened up presents and had cake. Brady LOVED his presents. I think his favorite was the Garbage truck.

Sunday we went to Cabellas and Pinehaven Farm. Cabellas is always kind of neat. Always makes me feel bad for the dead animals though. Pinehaven was a blast. Everyone had a good time and I highly recommend it to anyone who lives in the cities. The kids loved the animals and pumpkin patch. My personal favorite was Mooster the cow. He's my new boyfriend.

If you want to see a ton more pics you can go to my snapfish album.

My friends Olive Garden and Party City

I love traditions, especially when they include free salad and breadsticks and birthday presents. Thank you Bethany for my annual lunch at Olive Garden and my 3 book set of The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants! (I haven’t read the books or seen the movie yet so I’m pretty clueless – she swears I'll like it though.)

Before I went to lunch I ran to Party City and bought stuff for Brady’s birthday party next week. Party City is my new best friend. I can’t wait for Jayda’s birthday to roll around.

After Party City I ran to Famous Footwear to see if I could find a pair of Rocket Dog shoes like Erika’s and they didn’t have them. I was seriously sad. And the people working there were serious dinky-doos. That will be my last trip there (unless of course they have an irresistible sale).

After lunch I ran to Byerly’s to pick up a bday cake for my mom, who’s coming tomorrow and I also ordered Brady’s cake. Yay for me for knocking some things off of my to-do list.

UPDATE
Thanks Erika! I just bought my sought after rocket dogs from my newest friend shoes.com. They were even cheaper here than at Zappos.

My friend winkflash

I love winkflash. I don't love it for uploading and sharing photos, for that snapfish is my buddy, but for ordering prints and presents, winkflash is my man (99 cent shipping for all print orders and prints are just 12 cents). I just ordered my mom a mouse pad with the bath picture on it, a mug for my dad with his two dogs on it, and then I ordered a stretched canvas for me with Zara Z on it. I'm ever so happy now.

For mommy


For daddy

For me :)

Purple specs and more

So here is a picture of Brady in his pretty glasses. Too bad he isn't wearing them anymore; this morning we got his old pair back.

Saturday Erika and Alex came over for a visit. We played for a while and then went and had lunch at McDonalds. I always have high hopes for that place (visions of happy meals and happy kids dance through my head) but it never ends up being a good idea. We had to wait in the smallest line ever for like 15-20 minutes. I have no idea what the hold up was and it was seriously pissing me off. Apparently though I wasn't pissed off enough. Erika (while holding a very disgruntled Alex) made some crabby comment about how long she'd been standing in line and she got her whole meal for free. That almost made the lunch worth it - almost. I guess some people just weren't cut out for fast food.

<- Here is a picture of Alex looking at me like I'm loco. Wonder why...

Saturday night was crazy weather night. At 10:00pm our tornado sirens went off. Scared the crap out of me. Didn't help that Brian was down near Iowa watching some race. So I turned on the TV and saw that there was indeed a Tornado Warning for our county. Having been chastised before for not going down to the basement after hearing the sirens, I decided that I didn't want to get yelled at again. So I hauled the kids out of bed and brought them down to the basement until we got the all clear. Fun times. Fortunately they slept through all of it.

Good job guys

So last night after baths Brian was cleaning out Jayda’s ears like he always does; only this time something happened and he poked the Q-tip too far in her ear. She started screaming. It took her a couple of minutes to quit crying – tears were streaming down her face. We knew it had to have hurt. Both Brian and I have poked ourselves in the ear before so we know how much it hurts. Poor kid, we both felt really bad for her.

That’s not the last of it though. Around 3:00 am Jayda woke up and wouldn’t go back to sleep, not knowing what was wrong I just held her and then let her come into our bed with us. This morning she woke up and seemed fine but I noticed she had blood on her finger, I was like huh? Where did that come from? She wasn’t cut on her finger so I figured she must have been picking her nose or something (see post below). Then as I was doing her hair I noticed her entire ear was covered in dried blood. Yikes!! So I called the DR to see if I should bring her in and they were like “uhm yeah?! She could have a ruptured eardrum!” So I get into the DR office and the doctor is like “No matter what anyone tells you, Q-tips do not belong in a child’s ear – EVER!” He was pissed. So I apologized to him. Thinking back on it, I really didn’t owe him an apology but whatever… So he checks Jay’s ear out and thankfully she just has a ripped ear canal and not a ruptured eardrum. He gave me drops to give her 3 times a day for 7 days and told me to come back on Monday to make sure the ear canal was healing properly. He also said that blood would still be seeping out of her ear canal for about 5 days. And then he frowned at me and said DO NOT TRY AND CLEAN IT OUT. Use a wash cloth a couple of times a day and wipe the outside of the ear.

So that’s that story. Seems like Bri and I always have to learn proper child care the hard way and at the expense of our poor kids. I’ll never forget the time when Brady fell off of the washing machine. Big Fat F- - for us!

Here is a picture of a more happy bath time. :[

I think he's going to die

Last night I broke Brady’s glasses when I was trying to straighten them out, so this morning I ran around trying to get them fixed. To make a very long story short: he now has on a new temporary pair of glasses (with purple frames – he looks pretty flaming) and his other ones are being fixed for free since they’re under warranty for a year. It will take at least a week to get his other pair back. This is where the I think he's going to die comes in. Brian is going to freak out when he sees Brady sporting his purple specs. I giggle every time I think about it.

One out of two isn't bad

Brady is successfully NUK free.

He is not however potty trained. The worst part about it is that he wants to wear underwear. He loves watching his Elmo potty time video and wants to be like the kids on TV but for some reason he is terrified of the toilet. We have no idea why. He won't go in his potty chair either. He just doesn't get that if he wears undies he can't pee willy nilly. So every night we go through the battle of him wanting to wear underwear and swearing that he'll go pee pee in the potty and the next thing I know he's peeing in his undies. Granted he goes into the bathroom to pee so at least I'm not having to clean pee off the carpet but still... I want to just tell him no, no undies until he learns how to use the toilet but if I do that then how will he ever learn? I don't know what to do. Big fat F- for me.

FYI - We've tried a sticker chart, we've tried bribing him with candy, we've tried forcing him to go by making him sit on the toilet for minutes on end, we've tried books and videos (which he loves), and we've tried "going with him." Nothing works. (Oh, and he's not interested in sinking cheerios either.) I think we might just need to let up for a while. However, any advice is welcome.

Here is the little peepeehead sleeping.



And to top it all off, Jayda's developed a fondness for her nose.

The Weekend

Our friends from Michigan came for a visit this past weekend. Highlights of the visit for the majority of us were the Zoo, dinner at Acapulco, and the Twins/Tigers game. Highlights for Brian and Jason would be "Haydays" (snowmobile swap meet) and alcohol. :)

No joke: At the game Jason and fam went to purchase food. When they got back to their seats and opened up one of their hotdogs, they found that someone had spit gum in it before wrapping it up. Gross! I'm more pissed about it then they were. They just threw it out and figured it was because they were wearing their Tigers gear. If that's the case then I'm even more pissed. I mean what kind of person does that?

State Fair

My parents came for a visit and we went to the State Fair - I do love that place. I had roasted corn, chicken on a stick, soft preztel, and dt coke. I shared all of that food with the kids except for the corn, it was too hot and they didn't want any. I love getting food all to myself.



Good times!!

About ready to throw in the towel

The NUK experiment has not been going well at all. I am this close to breaking down and buying him another NUK. We're going on day ?? (lost track because of minimal sleep). Its getting worse as each day passes instead of better. He just keeps getting crabbier and crabbier and so do we. I'm starting to not care anymore if he sleeps with a NUK until he's 50. Enough is enough. We're giving it one more day...

Will we survive another night?

I know we are totally at fault for letting this go on this long but what can we say? It made life so much easier...

Brady was in love with his NUKs the kid had to go to bed with 2 every night from about the time he was 6 months old. Then some time last year he started chewing through them. At first I replaced them but after he chewed through the 4th NUK in so many days I decided to call it quits. I informed him that he had 3 NUKs left and after those were gone there were not going to be any more. Well, that seemed to work because he babied those NUKs and it took him a long time to get down to just 1.

After every NUK that was chewed through (aka broken) we had him help us throw it in the trash for the garbage man to come and take it. He loved that idea because he loved the garbage man.

So last night when I discovered that he chewed through his last NUK, I told him that we needed to throw it in the trash because it was broken and there weren’t any more NUKs left. He was a big boy now and didn’t need a NUK anyway. He nodded his head and helped me toss the NUK in the trash and said “the the the garbage man takes it now!” Didn’t cry didn’t fuss. We could not believe how well he was taking it.

Fast forward a couple hours later and he won’t go to sleep without his NUK (its way past his bedtime by the way). I told him it was in the trash and there weren’t anymore NUKs left and he started wailing.

Eventually I got him to go to sleep by telling him that if we went to the store tomorrow we would pick out a new one. I lied to him. I felt sort of bad but not really since I said IF and I really have no intentions of taking him to the store with me for a long time.

So then this morning he’s up at the crack of dawn wanting his NUK again and crying because he somehow smacked his face into his bedrail and his lips were bleeding. The morning went down hill from there. He sobbed for his NUK. Sobbed because his mouth hurt. Sobbed because he just wanted me to “hold you.” (he always says hold you instead of hold me) Sobbed because he was tired. He wouldn’t eat breakfast. His nose was running as bad as his eyes were and he couldn’t see because his glasses were foggy and tear splashed. Its a miracle that we all made it to our appropriate destinations in one piece. Poor daycare. He is going to be a crabby mess all day today.

How on earth am I going to deal with him tonight??? I think I might need to bribe him with the $50 waste of money excavator he's been wanting so bad.

I need super nanny. She can help me potty train him too.

Quiz

COMPUTER PROGAMMERS OR PSYCHOS?Click here to take this test and see if you can spot the computer programmers and the psychos.

Taking that gave me the hibey gibies... yet here I am encouraging you to take the quiz too. ;) I got a 7/10.

Redneck Fwd

These two pictures struck my funny bone:

Redneck Horseshoes



Redneck Pet Carrier

Another picnic

Hmmm let's see, what did this picnic consist of? Just the usual: Brady and Jayda clinging to me and Brian and not wanting to participate in any games.

It also consited of

• Playing at the park
• Eating surprisingly good food
• The above mentioned clinging while games were played (water balloon toss, tug of war, sack races, hula hoop contests, etc)
• Surprise visit from the ice-cream man
• Drawing (we actually won a $20 gift card to Applebee's)

Saturday night Brian did the fantasy football draft stuff while I watched Christmas with the Kranks. There were some parts that really made me laugh, if I hadn't read the book first (John Grisham's novel Skipping Christmas), I don't know if I would have thought it was funny at all though.

On Sunday Brian changed the oil in my car and put on new rotors and brakes. I love it that he can do maintenance on cars. He's my hero right now.

Friday's fun

I just got back from the dentist. My most favorite place in the whole world. Or it used to be before erosion and recession entered my life. I hate those words. Any way I have to go back to get a filling replaced in October and I'm also bringing Brady with me for his first appointment. Wonder if they'll think I'm crazy if I bring my camera with... :)

New subject:
I cannot count the number of times my yogurt has spit on me. Every time I open up my yoplait I try to do it slowly and carefully. Doesn't matter, every time it urps all over me. Freaking stuff. What is up with that??? I'm extra mad today because it landed on my new shirt from old navy (see right).

New subject:

Last night it rained and rained so we weren't able to play outside like we usually do after work/daycare. What did we do instead? Pulled out the good old markers. Brady was so cute, he wanted the Hungry Catepillar on his cheeks. Jayda however didn't want me putting anything on her cheeks. She kindly informed me that she would do it herself.

Yikes - wouldn't want to be that guy

Today at work I got the oddest email from another employee, one who I didn't know and hadn't heard of before. The email was addressed to *allusers so I figured it must be legit. Funny thing was it looked some kind of forward and all it said was you have to see this and then it had a link to a website. Being of curious nature, I clicked on the link and a video popped up - it looked like I was about to watch a magic show. The "magic show" soon turned into a naked chic doing some "magic" so I closed out the site. I was like holy crappers what is going on??? Then I see that the guy who sent it was desperately trying to recall the message. Obviously he wasn't successful. The next email the guy sends out is one apologizing for accidentally forwarding the dirty email. Apparently he was trying to forward it to one of his friends outside of the company and hit the wrong thing. What a crappy mistake for him. HR is going to have a field day with this one.

I love my family

This picture was taken right before we left. Jayda was at her wits end and desperately needed a nap.

I was up in the yoop this past weekend. I would never want to live there again but it sure is nice to visit. The visit consisted of

• Going out to the golf course to watch my mom play in the women's club championship
• Picking blackberries
• Picking tomatoes, green beans, cucumbers, peppers, and zucchini from my Dad's garden
• Playing with the animals
• Riding the horses
• Running Boundary Rd (I run 3 miles all of the time no problem but the hills on that road made me feel like an out of shape tub of lard)
• Playing euchre
• Baking zucchini nut bread with my mom
• And just all around having a good time

Ok so I'll play

Thanks Ris and Jam

Five things in my freezer:
1. Frozen veggies
2. Frozen lemonade
3. Simeks meatballs
4. Eggo waffels
5. Last piece of DQ icecream cake

Five things in my closet:
1. All of my clothes and shoes (50+ pairs)
2. All of Bri's clothes and shoes (4 pairs)
3. All of my hats (4)
4. All of Bris hats (50+)
5. Three bridesmaids dresses and my wedding dress

Five things in my car:
1. Toys for the kids and their over the hedge racoon and turtle (RJ and Verne)
2. Wipes
3. Kleenex
4. Lipgloss and lotion
5. Sunglasses (5 pairs - ridiculous I know)

Five things in my purse:
1. Lipgloss and lotion
2. Purell
3. Wallet
4. Cell phone
5. Coupon organizer (the numero uno most important thing in my purse :) )

Still hasn't noticed...

... but that's a good thing. Confrontations over $ are never fun. To be fair, after seeing my haircut picture, I can kind of see how it has escaped him. Can you tell that my hair color is supposed to match my eye color? That was the "look" we were going for. :)








On to potty training... once again Brady pooed before bathtime, so this time we got out some undies for him.










There is something so wrong about having the guys from the wiggles on his butt.

Lia who?

On Friday I decided that I couldn't take my hair any longer, so I called up Aveda and begged for an appointment that day if possible. Lucky day lucky day, a stylist named Shannon had a cancellation and therefore had an opening for me at noon. Yippee!

Now I normally see Amber, so I was going to be feeling kind of guilty if I saw her there while Shannon was doing my hair. Turned out though that Amber quit, so guilt free I could be (except for the amount of money I would be spending).

So I go to my appointment and meet Shannon (you always kind of wonder how well you're going to get along with your new stylist). I loved her! She looked like she could be a snob (very pretty and trendy) but she wasn't one at all. And she was totally off the wall in the humor department. I love people like that. As she was doing my hair I noticed her beautiful engagement ring, and I was like let me see that! And she was like oh no, that's not an engagment ring, that's a Lia Sophia. I was like that's a what? Apparently I'm a bigger dork than I thought. I had never even heard of Lia Sophia before. So as I'm sitting there paging through US Weekly and People I'm seeing this Lia Sophia stuff in there too.

I really need to get out more, that or get my hair done more often, which looks like its going to happen since I finally decided to quit being such a weiner and went back to getting partial foils. Ever since before Brady was born I have been going au natural. Not anymore. I'm going to be a slave to the roots again. Brian won't be happy about it once he finds out ($$$$).

Fortunately for me, its been 3 days and counting and he still hasn't noticed my hair. What did I expect? It took him 2 days before he noticed I got the turtle tattoo on my foot. Funny thing is, if I paint Brady's toenails because he wants to be like sister, Brian notices right away.

Speaking of Brady wanting to be like Jayda, here they are playing with Jayda's new shopping cart. :) It just kills Brian. Personally, I think its cute.

The pitbull

She's not really but that's what everyone thinks she is the first time they see her. For the record: she is an American Staffordshire Terrier and sweet as sweet can be, if you don't count the times she's biting older men, roudy kids, and aggressive dogs. All in all though she's pretty saintly. :)

Tootsie Pops

Hurray! Tootsie Roll is adding 3 new flavors to the Tootsie Roll family: Watermelon, Strawberry, and Blue Raspberry. Eight great siblings all in a row: Cherry, Grape, Chocolate, Orange, Raspberry, Strawberry, Watermelon, and Blue Raspberry! (I'm not making that up, I got it off their website, siblings in all.) The funny thing is they are only adding one new flavor per bag of tootsie pops, so in order to experience all 3 new flavors, you have to purchase 3 bags of tootsie's. Oh the way they scam the little people.

Even knowing that I'm being scammed, I'll still go out and buy all 3 bags. :)

Steer clear of me today

I am grouchy mcgee today. Here is why:

I hate corporate america
I hate projects at work that are 10 times worse than your worst homework assignment
I hate when people feel the need to visit in my cube for extended lengths of time, especially when they're talking about mumbo jumbo that I don't understand and doesn't even apply to me
I hate being tired
I hate feeling fat and always wanting to lose 5 lbs
I hate the UP (I know a lot of people love it. Not me! I swear to God that place has a dark and depressing aura. Just look at me, I spent a good deal of time growing up there and look how stellar I turned out.)
And I hate that I hate

I'm going to shut up now.

The birthday

So Chuck E Cheese wasn't the greatest this time around. Probably was a bad idea to go on a Friday night... probably was a bad idea to stay even though the majority of the tables were reserved for a birthday party. A party that consumes over 100 seats = a lot of unsupervised kids running around. Kids who like to push, shove, and pickpocket tickets and tokens. Its funny thinking about it now but at the time it kind of sucked.

Needless to say I don't have the greatest chuck e cheese pics, so here are pics taken after the fact.

Birthday Boy!


















Eating cake (DQ cake = yummy in my tummy!)

I'm so doing this on the next 90 degree day

New Hampshire woman bakes cookies on dashboard of her Toyota

BEDFORD, N.H. - Blistering heat was just what Sandi Fontaine needed to bake cookies for her co-workers — on the dash of her Toyota RAV4.

With temperatures soaring Wednesday, Fontaine placed two trays of cookie dough on the dashboard, shut the doors and retreated inside to her air-conditioned office.

"My husband wanted me to run some errands this morning," said Fontaine, who works at Baldwin and Clarke Corporate Finance. "I said, 'I can't. I'm baking cookies.'"

Fontaine first tasted her dashboard oven three years ago. She said anyone can do it; the only requirement is for the outside temperature to be at least 95 degrees, so it will rise to about 200 degrees in the car. Temperatures in the area reached the mid- to upper 90s on Wednesday.

"Mrs. Fields has nothing on Sandi," co-worker Brian Champigny said of the cookie company.

Though Thursday was supposed to be cooler, Fontaine said she'll still enjoy the benefits of her culinary effort. "When you open the door to that car," she said, "it's like, oh, my God. It's a wonderful smell."

Its like Christmas morning!

Because I was assigned a contract job at work, I needed to request a laptop from desktop services (ds). The laptop had some issues, so in the process of getting those issues resolved I became chummy with ds. Today I was down in their little workshop poking around and asked if they had anything that would clean my keyboard. They said sure, bring it down, we'll clean it out for you. Thrilled, I ran upstairs and brought it back down to be cleaned (the gross little thing hasn't been cleaned in years - it had more dust bunnies beneath the keys than my bed did not to mention the crumbs!) . I was expecting some magic little keyboard cleaning tool of some sort not the big air compressor that I found waiting for me. Who knew? I guess that's how they clean out all of the keyboards. If I knew that little trick I would have been bringing my keyboard home all of the time to let Bri blow it out (with his air compressor of course). ;) In fact I think I'm just going to clean everything with the air compressor from now on, why stop at a keyboard?

New subject, today is Brian's birthday. You know you've grown up when you choose to go to Chuck E Cheese for your birthday dinner to make your kids happy instead of going to Outback Steakhouse to make you happy. Truth of it is, if the kids aren't happy, you usually aren't either. So I guess this is a win win situation. Plus Bri and I have an outstanding contest involving Skee Ball. I LOVE THAT GAME!

Here is a pic of Brian enjoying his last Chuck E Cheese adventure. I can't wait to see what tonight's pictures will bring.

Potty training

Brady is nearing 3 and should already be potty trained. We tried (half-heartedly maybe) to potty train him right after he turned 2 and ever since then we periodically try again. A couple of nights ago he pooed about a half hour before I was ready to throw him in the tub, so I decided to make him go diaperless until it was bath time. After I took his dirty diaper off I said "Brady, if you have to go pee pee let me know so you can go in the toilet. I do not want pee pee on the floor again, understand?????" He whined a little bit and said "Noooo! I want a diaper on!" I explained to him in depth how wasteful it was to wear a diaper for only a half hour and that he shouldn't even be wearing diapers at all anymore etc etc. then I repeated what I said above about coming to get me if he needed to potty. After that he seemed to be ok with the idea and we parted ways. I went back to cleaning up the kitchen and he went back to watching his Sesamee Street DVD. The next time I checked on him this is what I found:

Funny but true

WORDS WOMEN USE

FINE
this is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up.

FIVE MINUTES
If she is getting dressed, this is half an hour. Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given 5 more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house.

NOTHING
This is the calm before the storm. This means "something," and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with "Nothing" usually end in "Fine."

GO AHEAD
This is a dare, not permission. Don't do it.

LOUD SIGH
This is not actually a word, but is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A "Loud Sigh" means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you over "Nothing."

THAT'S OKAY
This is one of the most dangerous statements that a woman can make to a man. "That's Okay" means that she wants to think long and hard before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.

THANKS
A woman is thanking you. Do not question it or faint. Just say you're welcome.

Oh, and one last one ...

"Whatever"
...it's a woman's way of saying *!#@ YOU!